FAQ

You have questions, I hope these can help you. If not, feel free to email me

What is an exclusive beat?

 Once you complete your purchase you will be emailed a link to be able to download the studio quality WAV audio files (24 bit, 48 kHz) of your beat, fully mixed as well as tracked out (each instrument on a separate track). You will also receive an Exclusive License Agreement, granting you the complete and exclusive usage rights of the beat. The beat will be solely yours and will never be resold to anyone else.

What programs do you use?

I use Cubase, Maschine, and ProTools for sequencing; Arturia, Native Instruments and Spectrasonics for virtual instruments; and ProTools for recording and mixing.

Can you mix my song for me?

Absolutely. Just drop me a line at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Other Questions:

1.Q: Why do your beats suck?

A: Because they don't

2. Q: Can I release a song made with your loops?

A: Hell yes. Just give me a little shout out in the credits.

3. Q: Do you only take PayPal?

A: Hell no. You can use a major credit card too, and if you email me at: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.  I'll give you the Lab address so's you can send me a money order. At the moment, we are unable to accept food stamps or car radios as payment.

4. Q: What is ProTools?

A: A bomb ass digital audio workstation that almost all major and minor studios use. If'n you need your beat in a different format, email me and we can work something out.

5. Q: My girl [or guy] is trippin' for no reason. What's up with that?

A: Only thing to do is buy a beat from the Lab, fire up the computer, and either:

a. Compose a mushy, syrupy sweet song to melt their heartz ....

or....

b. Spit some fire about what a scandalous, triflin' ass piece of garbage they are.

Either way, you'll feel better.

6. Q: I'm using a bunch of cracked, bootleg software that I hijacked from the internet. Because it didn't come with a manual, can you teach me how to use it?

A: I can't, but the Free Bootleg Institute can. You can reach them at www.fbi.gov. Just let them know what stolen software you have, and where you live.

              1. Q: My sound sucks. What the Hell am I doing wrong?

A: First off, use good sounds. No amount of processing will make up for flimsy kicks and weak-ass snares. Don’t go overboard on the effects…..The first thing an engineer will tell someone who drowns everything in fx is “I remember the first time I found the reverb button”. Keep it simple. For vocals, use a good mic, use a pop screen, and use a compressor. DO NOT apply effects or EQ while you are recording. Rule of thumb: Cut Dry. You can always add the hot sauce later. Don’t eat chips and try to cut vocals at the same time. Don’t get so blew out you have to record laying down. If the guy at guitar center tells you that you need the new Zorgotron 2000 to sound good, he’s looking for a commission.

8. Q: Can you make me a free beat?

A: Hell No.

9. Q: I heard that you once beat a man with his own dog. Is there any truth to that?

A: I am unable to comment on that.

10. Q: I’m down on my luck and need a place to stay. Can I sleep on the floor of your studio?

A: Babe= Yes, Dude= NO